Do
you remember the days when you first met your spouse or when you first got married
and everything was filled with fun, love and that amazing feeling of being
connected? Being away for even a short
period of time was like torture. This
“honeymoon” phase is complete bliss.
It is
easy to steer off that path and end up lost, confused, angry, sad,
lonely, disconnected, etc. We have everyday
challenges that can contribute to this- one of you lost your job, you
got too comfortable and stopped trying to look good, maybe one or the other is angry all
time because they can’t sleep, or maybe you have kids now and don’t make time
for one another. Whatever the case
maybe, you want to get back on track and have those blissful days with your
love.
It takes effort to get that spark you once had
going... Three tips to accomplishing just that:
1. Spend time with each other. You spent plenty of quality time together when you where dating and first married. You went to plenty of dinners and movies, maybe sports games, etc. So, DO IT AGAIN! Go on an actual date again.
2. Take some of the stress off your spouses shoulders. Does he/she stress every night about getting the kids to bed, getting work things ready for the next day AND cleaning? How about both tackle the duties required as to not over burden the other. Bonus: Then write a little love note and place it where he/she can find it . Its a pleasant surprise to see that during a stressful morning of rushing to work!
3. Talk to your spouse like you used to. Dream together, make plans, talk about the good ol' days. Plan a trip together, even if just a pretend trip to somewhere special. Talk to each other, talk a lot, connect and reach out to each other! Ask questions about his/her day, life, dreams and fears. And really really listen to the answers!
Realize that your spouse can't make love to you the way you'd like unless he/she feels CONNECTED to you first. Women feel connected by hearing and seeing that they're loved. Men feel connected when they are complimented and touched. No man or woman just "know" they are loved all the time. We need to be reminded everyday, several times a day! If your spouse feels repeatedly connected to you, she/he will reciprocate and make you feel connected as well (aka, by making love to you!)
1. Spend time with each other. You spent plenty of quality time together when you where dating and first married. You went to plenty of dinners and movies, maybe sports games, etc. So, DO IT AGAIN! Go on an actual date again.
2. Take some of the stress off your spouses shoulders. Does he/she stress every night about getting the kids to bed, getting work things ready for the next day AND cleaning? How about both tackle the duties required as to not over burden the other. Bonus: Then write a little love note and place it where he/she can find it . Its a pleasant surprise to see that during a stressful morning of rushing to work!
3. Talk to your spouse like you used to. Dream together, make plans, talk about the good ol' days. Plan a trip together, even if just a pretend trip to somewhere special. Talk to each other, talk a lot, connect and reach out to each other! Ask questions about his/her day, life, dreams and fears. And really really listen to the answers!
Realize that your spouse can't make love to you the way you'd like unless he/she feels CONNECTED to you first. Women feel connected by hearing and seeing that they're loved. Men feel connected when they are complimented and touched. No man or woman just "know" they are loved all the time. We need to be reminded everyday, several times a day! If your spouse feels repeatedly connected to you, she/he will reciprocate and make you feel connected as well (aka, by making love to you!)
No comments:
Post a Comment