THE CHALLENGE IS RESPONSIBILITY

The biggest challenge those wtih ASPD and Bipolar disorder have to overcome, after actually admitting they have a mental illness to begin with, is their tendency to simply explain away the illogical, immoral, unethical and painful actions they commit through assigning all blame on the chemical imbalance that is a part of who they are in life. 

Truth is when those with a  mental illness diagnosis such as these refuse to accept that they are held to accountability just as everyone else that takes a breath, they are easily confused and troubled by mild messages they receive from others. If a lack of knowing right from wrong at the time of a mental breakdown has been established, there is diminished capacity according to the law. What is lost in this logic is the damage done to the victims of angry manipulative outbursts or actions based on their desires during an episode.  During such times, jobs are lost, marriages destroyed, families are fractured and even dire crimes committed.  We do not live in a pristine world of black and white, or all or none thinking.   It is the faulty thinking as is characteristic in ASPD and Bipolar disorder to hold to, in the aftermath of harsh words and/or physical assault, the notion that a chemical imbalance is the culprit and is in by no means a fair release from culpability.
    There is much work in healing the breakdown of civility which goes on with those in stressful situations. Even though one may be delusional, their actions may result in pain to another. Aren’t they then responsible for their pain? Too often one is too proud to apologize, feeling it will only supply ammunition to an enemy and will weaken a claim to be the righteous one, the one wronged. This does not lead to understanding. It only increases the gulf already formed.
    Everything negative that happens to one in their life statistically can never be the fault of someone else.  If one breaks a set law, moral or ethical standard then the negative that occurs as a result is not the fault of the other.  It is the fault of the one who broke the law or standard.  So it is important to set the record straight through acknowledging the damage done and in most cases results in the beginning of a dialogue. “I’m sorry you were injured by my actions, or, what occurred between us is regrettable; let’s strive for a better understanding.”
The argument that a chemical imbalance is at the heart of a divide is an over-simplification and an easy way out. If you make a mess, then you have to clean it up. It is your responsibility.  Sometimes it’s just what is needed along with the resolution to learn and accept that a chemical imbalance does not define a person.... Its overcoming the imbalance and taking responsibility for the wrongs and making them right that defines one as a human being. 

Ten Ways to Take Responsibility

1. Be honest with yourself; admit your limitations.
2. Acknowledge your contribution to the misunderstanding.
3. Mentally exchange places with those you’ve harmed and
4. see the situation from their view.
5. See an outsider to mediate a dialogue.
6. Cool down before reacting.
7. Take time before trying to resolve an issue.
8. Recognize the futility of all or none thinking.
9. Seek understanding with goodwill.
10. Educate yourself on the difference between being reactive in the face of an altercation and looking at the aftermath for your opportunity to set things right.
11. Remain open.

I understand that society encourages one to take the path of least resistance.  It is easier to be a victim than to admit that one is at fault and brought the circumstances on themselves.  Its sad to see a person who could have a life as a productive functioning citizen harbor such bitterness and seek to cause so much hurt and pain to others simply because they refuse to take the steps necessary to focus not on their desires but rather on their integrity as a human being.  We are all taught the difference between right and wrong.  To do what is right is a conscious choice and is generally takes the most effort of the two because our desires would lead us to do the wrong thing based soley on our own self centeredness.  Its best to live by the saying, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."  If you were in a relationship or married and witnessed your spouse kissing another, how would/did you feel?  If your spouse left you for another because the other sought a relationship with your spouse knowing the marital status, how would you feel?  If someone stole something valuable to you, how would that make you feel?  The answer to all is angry, hurt and sad.  Then dont do those things regardless the circumstances.  Otherwise be prepared for the consequences that will follow you for a long time after.  That's just life- chemical imbalance or not. 

Manipulation

I blogged a while ago about mapping tendencies and patterns in a sociopath.  I have noticed when one with ASPD cycles to a self introspection mode they will proceed to attempt to produce poetry while thinking in their mind that they are being intellectual or creative.  This is with the purpose to receive accolades regarding their "creativity" and manipulate as much as it is to prove to themselves that they have a measure of intelligence.  Im not one to ever fault anyone for free expression but in the case of the FB post below, as a professional, I see a mind that is engulfed in a storm of misfiring synapses.  Although short, it expresses the opposite of what I believe the author intended.  The fact is that in no shape or form does an individual with ASPD "see clearly" and very few if any at all recognize the psychological state which they find themselves.  If anything the only truth in this attempted prose is "he cant see through concrete" which in his case is the wall between fantasy and reality.  Between right and wrong.  Between moral and immoral.  He is unable to discern that the place he is in life is a direct consequence of the "wall" or "concrete" as he terms it.  He is unwilling to take responsibility for the actions he has committed that directly or indirectly hurt others in his search for "happiness". 
    This real issue is that ASPD suffers are in a prison of their own design.  Although there exists no cure for the disorder, treatment does exist but his narcissim prevents him from acknowledging that he has a problem.  Multiple psychiatric hosptial admissions(DD) were nothing more than a vacation in his mind for he refused to build on the therapeutic benefit that began through outpatient therapy.  Everyone has the capability to respect established boundaries its just that he like most other sociopaths CHOOSE not to.  He knows the difference between right and wrong but CHOOSES to only follow the path that satisfies his self centeredness irregardless if wrong.  In his case the history of poor decisions has left him living a nomadic lifestyle alone with few true friends, almost non-existent family interaction and a criminal history that prevents any real chance at a career.  Truth be told, he is to be pityed but to do so would be an invitation to be another victim of his manipulating nature and existence.  He will die alone and bitter because of his narcissim that leads him to destroy every relationship and creates enemies of most that have in one way or the other been impacted by his manipulation.  I can not help but think that his post below is nothing more than another attempt to manipulate someone, somewhere to believe he is someone he is not.  

‎"9 million times

Standing in the shadow and light
I find myself
I can see clearly ...

I just can’t see through concrete
I find myself
Standing in the shadow and light"