To Be Needed

To be accepted, to be loved, to know that you are the "only one", that "one special person" to someone else is the quest that drives human beings.  God said that it is not good that man should be alone so He made him a helpmeet.  He made a partner for Adam- did you get that?  SPECIFICALLY for Adam.  Adam did not have to search... He did not have to go to bars or turn to the internet to find that "special someone".  So it is to be with us.  If you ask, most people will agree that everyone has a "soulmate" wandering about more than likely looking themselves.  We spend so much time in our lives "looking for love".  As teens most change relationships like changing their clothes.  During which time we make so many mistakes that can stand to impact future relationships.  Unfortunately all this trial and error accomplishes is a comparative mentality.  It becomes a source of insecurity in otherwise solid relationships.  The sad reality is that the comparative mentality can harden hearts to the place that many overlook or take for granted the "one", their "soulmate" when they find each other.  Its important to keep in mind that as teenagers and young adults that if we had a nickel for each time we told another person/people that we "loved them", most of society would be filthy rich.  What this says is that we all allowed ourselves to be molded based on our natural desire to "not be alone."  Fact is, most can look back and see that all the "I love you's" said were more appropriately, "I lust you".
Have I looked back on my life and relationships to find instances to where I can say with assurity that I was "in love" with that person?  I have and Yes there was one relationship where I was truely "in love".  I married her!  Love just didnt happen though.  Love is a process.  It takes time.  It takes spending time with the person.  Getting to know the person- their strengths and weaknesses.  Coming to a place where you could not imagine your life without them and then committing to be monogamous to that person till the last breath escapes your body.  So many people confuse lust for love.  A few sexual encounters does not constitute love especially as teenagers.  Love is not about ego or fear.  Love is more than a word.  Its more about action.  Its committment, dedication, honesty, compassion, joy and mercy.  If you have truely experienced love then you know what it is and will hold a great respect for it.  If you havent ever experienced TRUE love then there is no way to understand.  There is no way you will recognize it when you see it in others thus you will disrespect it and will not hesitate to try and destroy it.  Afterall, Misery Loves Company.
People should stop "searching" and allow God to bring the person He made for and intends for them to be with.  In divine perspective, God will not ever bring you to someone who is already married or will never lead someone who is married to another.  That's not at all hard to understand!