Now apply that same psychological characteristic to everyone in your life. Spouses, Family and friends have a deeper intimate knowledge of the things we hold important and more specific our absolutes- the situations that we are unyielding, the issues that would lead us to make concrete changes. Lets say for example ones significant other frivolously buys something that they know will upset their mate and proceeds to hide the purchase but their significant other finds out, is hurt by the deceit but then accepts the betrayal following nothing more than a few "conversations" and an apology. The dishonesty still occurred just as the it does in the case of politicians. It is the same and the response is similar because just as the voting majority, the significant other accepts that its insignificant and based on the spouses "it will never happen again" the dishonesty becomes an after thought after all it did not go against an "absolute". Now lets propose that the betrayal encroaches upon the area of an "absolute" for most and engages in an illicit relationship in any form understanding that at initiation of and during the illicit relationship that the life they are living with their significant other is ruled by dishonesty that will inevitably lead to severe emotional pain and consequences for all in the life they betrayed. Contrast this with the dishonesty of the politician who understands that the calculated promises they made with no intention to maintain will ultimately negatively impact the lives of everyone they represent. In each case, once the dishonesty is illuminated, they are subjected to scrutiny- the politician at the hands of the media and constituents. The offending significant other however has to deal with a smaller scope having lost the trust of the very ones who have been by their side through good times and bad, sickness and health, richer and poorer. Politicians have experts whose job is solely to "clean up the mess" and the one basic rule of successful damage control and perception rehab is to simply come clean and tell the entire truth- no matter the degree of pain it may cause. The psychology of politics states that the pain of the truth is more easily overcome than is the drudge of doubt. In the case of betrayal through an illicit relationship the same rule applies. However there are no "experts" helping the offending spouse to rehab their image and trust. Understand that once the betrayal has been found out, the betrayed spouse will seek information to absorb much like a sponge absorbs liquid. A period of endless questions will begin and it's at this time, regardless of the known absolutes of the betrayed, the truth is the only way to satisfy the storm of doubt raging and deep pain that has been inflicted. The doubt brought by the betrayal is the relationship killer. Lets say for example that the betraying spouse maintains that the illicit relationship did not get physical- did not see personally or had sexual contact.. It did not progress past Internet, text, phone calls but while reviewing the text communication by the betrayed one simple statement made by the betraying to the other man/woman alludes to "missing him/her" before being found out. That implies to the betrayed that a face to face relationship occurred because how can you "miss" someone if text messaging and voice calls were the extent of the ongoing illicit relationship. The offending spouse has all the incentive in the world to continue the dishonesty especially knowing that a physical infidelity is an absolute of the offended spouse that would potentially lead to an irrepairable reconciliation.
I realize that it appears that I strayed about from my opening statement but my intent is simply to expound on the importance of complete honesty in all areas of our existence. Politics and relationships are the two most important areas that dictate the direction of our lives and ironically dishonesty and betrayal is rampant in both. The only way to repair the political arena and reconcile relationships where damage has been done is to remove any doubt. Coming partially clean and trying to bury the infractions against perceived absolutes will eventually bring greater pain and sure destruction. The Bible is clear when it tells us to be sure that your sins will find you out. The truth can overcome absolutes and besides, The only way to live with integrity is by owning the saying, "The truth will set you free!"
