Many people completely misunderstand the traits of a sociopath. Sociopaths do NOT have any real friends, they do not want friends, nor do they have the emotions that are required to be a friend. Instead of friends, a sociopath wants loyal followers, people who will do anything to help the sociopath achieve their own narcissistic goals. They gain followers by using an act — known as their “persona”— pretending to be an upright, trusting person, and a great friend. Their persona is nothing like their real personality. But they are quite believable.
The terms “friend” and “sociopath” are mutually exclusive. What does that mean? It means you can have a real friend, and you may know a sociopath, but you cannot have a real friend who’s also a sociopath.. What you can be is a loyal follower, or even a disciple to a sociopath, and as such, they will treat you as if you were a friend … but it is not sincere. As long as you provide some value to them, something they need, value as simple as companionship, they will keep you around. But once they tire of your companionship, you will be left with no doubt.
As most people are aware, a sociopath, or more precisely, someone afflicted with Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD) and/or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), does not feel any guilt or remorse for the things they’ve done to others, but on a larger scale, it’s not just those emotions that they lack … sociopaths do not have any of the typical emotions that most people take for granted.
So along with lacking negative emotions, such as guilt and remorse, they also lack what most would consider positive emotions, such as compassion, love, joy, security, and passion. This is what’s often overlook, but critically important: a sociopath’s lack of emotions does not end with the negative emotions. Hence, a person with APD or NPD does not have the capacity to feel any positive emotions, preventing them from thinking about anyone else, but themselves. A sociopath cannot feel the emotions required in a friendship, so they act them out. And often, they over-act with a certain plastic appeal.
Most sociopaths or psychopaths have likely identified how they differ from most people, and in their minds, they’re superior to virtually all of “us.” They do not need friends … they need loyal followers. A sociopath cares only about themselves, and how they can use others to strengthen their narcissistic goals.
As soon as you don’t offer them the same value, or you hesitate doing something they ask of you, or they simply sense something different — watch how fast that “best friend” relationship will collapse. You were certain they felt for you as you did for them. No one wants to believe how sinister and cold another “human” can be. Most people won’t believe it until it happens to them … it’s the definition of intense gut-wrenching.
You were in their inner circle. You know a lot. Sociopaths often suffer with paranoia, and even if it’s their own paranoia that causes them to sense a lack of loyalty from you, it’s no different to them … it’s just as real.
Consider this, and trust me, whatever your sociopath friend may say to counter this, it’s just what they do best — lie. A sociopath not only does not feel guilt or remorse, but it does not stop there … they do not have any typical human emotions.
They do not feel love, friendship, compassion … nothing, it’s all faked. It’s called their public persona. A sociopath’s persona has virtually no resemblance to their true personality. They know they are different, but they may know nothing more than that. It’s not of interest to them. What is of ultimate interest is control.
They build a group of followers by faking friendship, charm, compassion … until people are so sucked-in and so brainwashed that they now respect and admire a very evil sociopath. Some sociopaths wear their persona all the time, i.e., 24/7. Those sociopaths know all too well that what they do, the things they get away with, would likely be just as revolting to their family as with anyone else.
Oh, and that family consisting of a spouse, and 2.5 kids? It’s all part of the act. They want to blend in. They know a family is an important element. They know belonging to a church, a synagogue, or any place that brings people together to worship, will assuredly benefit the cause of blending in.
A sociopath knows their family members cannot be aware of their real activities, because if they are, they would become a threat just as anyone else would. And the sociopath responds to a family-based threat no differently then by someone they hardly know. They must protect themselves from exposure … any slight threat or risk must be dealt with immediately, with what I call: offensive-revenge.
When looking at a sociopath, all you see is another person. What you will never see is that person’s history. Their history is like a hostility throttle. Depending on what they’ve gotten away with in the past determines how they will respond to an attempted exposure now and degree is based on his degree of paranoia.
One sociopath with whom I am familiar changes his city of residence weekly on Facebook due to his intense paranoia. He is certain that he is being tracked by people which he conned money from in the past and to be fair these individuals are the type to hunt him down not because of the money but rather the lack of respect they were shown. Truth be known however, he is in the same place because his limited "disability" income does not afford him the luxury of living the truly nomadic lifestyle he tries to portray. Anyone that knows of his financial challenges and deficiency laugh at the facade. In his paranoia and through his narcissistic personality the lies fuel his delusion of superiority as consistent with ASPD. He is such a joke but hey, he's free entertainment.
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